How Do You Disconnect From the Awfulness?
Earlier this week, before most of us had woken up, the President of the United States did the following: He attacked Matt Lauer for being fired for sexual misconduct, something he himself has been accused of multiple times, continued his attacks on the media (CNN in particular), suggested Joe Scarborough murdered an intern, and shared possibly fake videos posted by the account of a far right wing hate group in the U.K. meant to suggest all Muslims are violent. This came as the FCC is trying to overturn net neutrality, the Republicans are pushing through a despicable tax cut for the rich, and the polls have moved back in favor of Roy Moore in Alabama. It’s enough to drive you insane before you’ve had your coffee.
What, if anything, should we be doing to mitigate the constant state of dread and unease we’re feeling every morning? The Old Guys™ discuss.
Luke:
About two minutes after waking up this morning I was, once again, distraught and agitated. My entire day was ruined before it even began. I was talking about this with some friends online, and one of them said, "Today would be a very good day to not be online." I agreed at first, because who wouldn’t want to just ignore the state of things. But I can’t help myself. I just can’t look away. It’s wreaking havoc on our collective mental health. What are you doing, if anything, to keep yourself from going crazy?
Dave:
One thing I am definitely doing is actively soliciting ideas on how not to have a full nervous breakdown. Because this is one of the few drawbacks of living on the west coast: I wake up, roll over, look at my phone, and the 12 new horrifying things are already three hours old. Push notifications have been issued. Think pieces have been posted. There has been a reaction on Twitter, a reaction to the reaction, a whole new wave of thought that suggests the terrible thing I just found out about is actually a good thing, and then a reaction to that, often expressed in GIFs of Real Housewives. And that’s before the fundraising emails come. Each new morning, I feel as though I have been shot out of a cannon, and the cannon is pointed at a toilet.
"Each new morning, I feel as though I have been shot out of a cannon, and the cannon is pointed at a toilet."
Luke:
Feeling vindicated at the moment to live in the Prime Universe of EST.
Dave:
The morning after Election Day last year, I called my parents to get a little cheering-up. Dad gave me the boilerplate “You’ll survive this” speech, but my mom said something that really stuck with me. She said: “Dave, maybe just don’t pay attention.” It seemed so simple, so hopeful: Just check out. It made me angry, because a) that’s a terrible suggestion, and b) I can’t. To live, I must work, and to work, I must pay attention to what’s happening around me. More than that, I’m afraid of the kind of person I’d become if I disengaged. Not paying attention is what got us here.
But of course, like all bad advice, it sounds like a lot of fun.
Basically, I am at Stress Level: Showtunes. There’s a station on SiriusXM called “On Broadway” that’s all showtunes, all the time, and I’m listening to it pretty much nonstop. These are songs that are designed to make you feel good inside, or at least sad in a profound and stirring way. Plus, all the DJs are Broadway people, so every air break sounds like a Tony acceptance speech. Constant, irrational, million-watt exuberance at all times. It’s a nice little break... and you just might learn something along the way!
Also my weed consumption has tripled.
Luke:
My alcohol consumption has also skyrocketed, which isn’t really much of a help, because it tends to exacerbate my anger when I’m scrolling through Twitter after a few bowls of loud mouth soup every night.
I have been seriously contemplating disengaging lately. Not from my Civic Duty or whatever, but from my Eternal Watch on the Wall of News. But while there may be benefits to that in terms of mental health, there’s also the slight problem that I make my entire living by being online, and by Being Online, and becoming destitute might also have certain drawbacks on my well-being. What is another job besides media? Are there any? My wife is a teacher, so she doesn’t have the burden of mainlining news all day like we do. I envy her for that sometimes. She probably doesn’t even know, let’s see, spinning the Wheel of Pain at random here, about Principled Maverick John McCain saying he’s gonna support this massive upward distribution of wealth and health care destruction bill. On the other hand, dealing with 3rd graders all day... not sure which is worse.
People typically suggest when one is depressed to spend time with friends, or to engage in healthy activities like going for walks or exercising, but the problem here is all my friends have gone insane too, and when I’m alone with my own thoughts, there’s really nothing else to think about besides the state of the country. Are all your friends going mad?
Dave:
I think everyone is falling apart privately, but when we get together, we do what we can to keep our minds off it (which is to say: we drink).
I know I need to be stronger than I’ve been. After we published the Election Day oral history a few weeks ago, some Breitbart/Federalist/whatever guy screencapped all the parts where journalists cried or vomited, and then posted the picture and said something like: “These parts made me the happiest.” I remember being in the Esquire offices on Election Night, once the outcome started to look inevitable, and a reporter on TV said: “Backstage at the Javits Center, I saw Lady Gaga and Katy Perry holding each other and crying,” and I thought: Well, for a lot of Trump voters, that was kind of the whole point. They feel forgotten or condescended to, and they’re going to make the elites and snoots and weirdos pay, even if it means they end up literally rooting for Drago at the end of Rocky IV.
"I have been seriously contemplating disengaging lately. Not from my Civic Duty or whatever, but from my Eternal Watch on the Wall of News."
What I’m saying is that there is big trouble afoot, and the people who are driving it are counting on us either to fall apart or disengage. So the suggestion that you get outside and go running is a very good and practical one. I’ve been doing it more and more, at longer and longer distances, and where I used to need music to power me forward, I now see the value of sweet, sweet silence.
And also weed.
What I think I absolutely need is a two-hour period each day where the phone is out of my hands, the television is off, the laptop is closed, and I am talking about anything else. Do you think you’re capable of such a thing? Because I don’t.
Luke:
That sounds like an absolute dream. I think I am capable of it under the following conditions:
I’m in the midst of a deep sleep.
I’m swimming.
I’m having sex.
There is no escaping it, in all honesty. And now the news of Flynn pleading guilty just came down this morning, and it looks like they have the votes for the tax bill, so how are we supposed to focus on anything besides that? I think the only solution is for us all to go have sex in a pool right now. Two hours might be a bit of a stretch there, however.
Dave:
Oh yeah. I am sitting in front of my television, going back and forth between MSNBC (who is talking about Flynn) and Fox News (whose chyron says "Does This Cloud Look Like Kelsey Grammer? We Think It Does"). I also have my laptop open and I am refreshing Twitter twice a second. Meanwhile a thing that has not yet been written is about to be voted on, and I have opinions I have not yet expressed about Call Me By Your Name. It’s not even 9 a.m.
I am, of course, very enthusiastic for this Russia probe to wrap up, but I think my enthusiasm comes from the idea that it will mean an end to daily chaos. Of course it won’t. I mean, if the President is indicted for obstruction of justice, the world is going to become a very hot swimming pool sex party for at least a full day, but then what? I don’t think we go back to the way things were one year ago. This is our world now, and it is getting less stable by the day. So the question remains: How do we make time for self-care in this new, unstable world?
I come back to long runs and weed. You might also want to try my daily practice of Totally Meaning To Meditate.
Luke:
For today, at least, I am going to go to therapy. I will try not to talk or think about Trump for an hour. And then I’ll go for a nice run and listen to sports talk radio. The Celtics look pretty good this year. Ah, sports, now there’s an area where politics will never come up. At least we have that.
Dave:
Sondheim for me. At least until we reach Stress Level: Reggae.
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