20 Epic Dollyisms to Celebrate Dolly Parton’s Birthday

In her 77 years on this earth, Dolly Parton has taught us many important lessons—like never skimp on hair spray. So, in honor of the Grammy-winning singer-songwriter, Oscar/Emmy/Tony–nominated actress (EGOT status, ya’ll), philanthropist extraordinaire and godmother to Miley Cyrus, here, 20 of the greatest quotes from the “Dolly Lama” herself.

1. “My weaknesses have always been food and men—in that order.” — Dolly Parton

2. “I was the first woman to burn my bra—it took the fire department four days to put it out.” — Dolly Parton

3. “It’s hard to be a diamond in a rhinestone world.” — Dolly Parton

4. “If I see something saggin’, baggin’ or draggin’, I’m gone have it nipped, tucked or sucked!” — Dolly Parton

5. “I’m not offended by all of the dumb blonde jokes because I know I’m not dumb…and I also know that I’m not blonde.” — Dolly Parton

6. “It costs a lot of money to look this cheap.” — Dolly Parton

7. “I have a strict policy that nobody cries alone in my presence.” — Dolly Parton

8. “If you talk bad about country music, it’s like saying bad things about my momma. Them’s fightin’ words.” — Dolly Parton

9. “People say I look so happy—and I say, ‘That’s the botox.’” — Dolly Parton

10. “I tried every diet in the book. I tried some that weren’t in the book. I tried eating the book. It tasted better than most of the diets.” — Dolly Parton

11. “The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you got to put up with the rain.” — Dolly Parton

12. “I’m old enough and cranky enough now that if someone tried to tell me what to do, I’d tell them where to put it.” — Dolly Parton

13. “Me jumpin’ up and down? I’d blacken both my eyes!” — Dolly Parton

14. “I don’t kiss nobody’s butt.” — Dolly Parton

15. “I wish you joy and happiness. But above all of this, I wish you love.” — Dolly Parton

16. “If you don't like the road you're walking, start paving another one.” — Dolly Parton

17. “The seeds of dreams are often found in books, and the seeds you help plant in your community can grow across the world.” — Dolly Parton

18. “You’ll never do a whole lot unless you’re brave enough to try.” — Dolly Parton

19. “I have pretty good skin considering my age, and I think a lot of it is mineral oil and bacon grease.” — Dolly Parton

20. “Don’t get so busy making a living that you forget to make a life.” — Dolly Parton

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